WHAT IS THE POINT OF HAVING A COLD IF YOUR ON DEMAND DOESN'T WORK AND YOU CAN'T WATCH FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS AND MOVIES ALL DAY. FUCK ME.

i slept through/watched all five hours of the top 100 songs of the 90s, watched lost in translation, and browsed a two hour special on kids at fat camp. fat camp doesn't seem so bad and the thing i was watching kind of made me want to go. i never got to go to sleepaway camp.

it sucks that when i was born the only people that had cell phones were yuppies and stock brokers, and now everyone feels as though they need to have one. as in it's not safe to not have a cell phone on you at all times. i really wish it wasn't that way. as a matter of fact, if i could walk out of my house without my phone and not feel panicky and completely vunerable in the worst possible way to everything around me i would.
and don't even get me started on how texting is ruining people's ability to speak to one another.

what if we just end up silent? only speaking to one another through technology and never looking into each others eyes and forgetting how to speak all together.

anyways.

(little man being erased)

i'm working on this new piece right now. it's a collage thing on this channukah card envelope that i cut/ripped open. it basically has no meaning, i'm just creating it because i like the way it looks. since i started it last night, i'm seeing everything in my house as material for it. i look and wonder how i could manage to glue it on or cut it up or bend it and use it for what i'm making. also, i'm taking my time. usually when i'm making something i just do it all in one sitting. i pull these crazy all nighters because i'm afraid my level of inspiration and focus won't be there if i walk away from it. i'm totally going at a really steady, healthy pace with it though. i work on it for a while, make however much process on it i feel like depending on how into it i am at the time and then just let it go. as in just stop whenever i'm sick of working on it. and i'm not worrying about themes or meanings or metaphors or anything, it's all just about the aesthetics. so basically i'm just making this thing because i like it it and feel like making something. which is incredibly refreshing.

the next time you're stressed, just get high, sit in your room, put on your favorite music and make something. fabulous fabulous stuff, i must say.

i would also suggest a playlist including plenty of radiohead.

so much honey

HURLEY BURLEY. FLIPPED UPSIDE THE FUCK DOWN.


don't you hate it when timing is off?

all the funny things that animals do

i haven't been this in love since jimmy fallon.





i realize i'm not 14 and have no right to be posting pictures of guys i think are hot on my blog
but fuck that.

framed like a picture

my titles to these things never make any sense, please completely disregard them.

what's really weird/good about life is how you can find realizations about yourself in the most unlikely of situations. i'm not saying i'm not a complete wreck by any means. i totally am.
but this time whatever's happening inside me and my head and my heart isn't ruling over every aspect of my life. i'm keeping it together. like, actually behaving somewhat like an adult and taking things one day at a time and making sure to take care of myself. i don't cry a lot and i've built up a thicker skin.
i'll always be a neurotic female, it's in my veins and i wouldn't have it any other way. i love that i feel a lot and i love that as a result of that i get to have moments where everything feels good and i'm completely full of life and love and everything else that's good.
but somehow i've started to learn how to keep things in check and it's really positive for me.

as far as friendships go
i just prefer these certain three people to anyone else in the world right now. they're friends with the current me, and the current me can't (or doesn't want to) deal with anyone else.
point being i love it when these three are mean to me and i love it when they're nice to me and the beauty of it is that none of it means anything at all.
there couldn't be three more perfect people for me right now.

a concept: everything is far from perfect but i guess that means that everything kind of is how it's supposed to be for my life. which means everything kind of is perfect, even if that's not what i imagined perfect to be.

what i'm trying to get at is sometimes it's good to say to yourself "i'm fucked up, but at least i'm not THAT fucked up."
comparison is a useful tool.

purify the colors
purify
my
mind